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Letter from my heart
September 23, 2012
I have really missed sharing my heart with you. I have continued to spend time in God’s Word and also read and listened to sermons which touched me deeply. I have been in daily thought and lain awake many nights, praying and listening to God. You too have all been in my thoughts and I have been thinking to write to you and have finally come to sit down early this morning.
As you are aware of, we are expecting our 3rd baby. Sometime later in October will mark the arrival of another treasured child to our home, a wonderful blessing! Things around our home are nearly into place and we are getting more excited as the time draws nearer.
This hasn't been an easy pregnancy for me, as hormones resulted in nausea, ligament and muscle pain, tiredness and emotional ups and downs as I have never experienced before. My other pregnancies were much easier and I now have true understanding and empathy with other women who experience this and who suffer from other illness which have a similar or worst draining effect on them.
It has also been an emotional time of inner turmoil for me, because of relational strain with close family. This is mostly the reason why I haven’t been sharing my heart-stirring with you as I have been struggling to deal with my feelings. I have been searching my thoughts and heart deeply, surrendering myself to and asking God to help me and change me. I have drawn near to my Father God and He has been with me. Trusting and leaning on Jesus has met my need in so many ways. God has showed me things in my personal life both good and bad and He is helping me grow, changing my character. If you would like me to share more of this with you, I encourage you to ask me about these things when we see each other again.
We all have seasons in our lives, with some being very difficult. Sometimes it seems as though winter has been too long, almost as if it has crept in to stay and that your spring is just not arriving!? I am encouraging you to, like me, not lose hope. In the storm, you have to trust in God who is your very strong Anchor. He holds you very safely in His Hands and will not let go. Keep on resting assuredly; keep on trusting the God Who knows you and Who made you. (Psalm 139)
We do not surprise Him in any way and He easily forgives and sets us free from our trouble. God doesn't want you to put your hope in people (yourself or others) as they will disappoint. Intentionally or unintentionally. We all know and have experienced that: actions and words can hurt greatly. Either we have been on the receiving side or have hurt others ourselves. We all know that we can’t turn back time to undo our wrongs or take back words we spoke. I am sure just as I would like people, especially my friends and family to forgive me, you too would like the same. I try my best not to hurt or disappoint people, but as we all have our weaknesses, I most assuredly at some point do and will need God’s and their forgiveness. We have to keep on forgiving others, just as God will keep on forgiving us.
God is Love, He is God of Mercy and Grace and just to forgive us and He expects us to forgive one another.
Psalm 86:15 (NIV): “But you, O Lord, are a compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness.”
1 John 1:9 (NIV): “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.”
Ephesians 4:32 (NIV): “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”
Matthew 6:14 (NIV): “For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.”
I would like to end off this letter to you by encouraging you to also seek God earnestly, surrendering yourself to Him so that He can teach and lead you. God is Absolutely MORE THAN ENOUGH, Jesus is EVERYTHING YOU NEED.
Isaiah 30:18 (AMP): “Therefore the Lord [earnestly] waits [expecting, looking, and longing] to be gracious to you; and therefore He lifts Himself up, that He may have mercy on you and show loving-kindness to you…. Blessed (happy, fortunate, to be envied) are all those who [earnestly] wait for Him, who expect and look and long for Him….”
I also want to share a song with you, sure some of you know it already and if you don’t please take the time to go and listen to it. This song is a serious song, to me it is my longing and heart’s desire to KNOW God in everything and in order to receive I have to surrender to Him, completely.
Listen to: “I Surrender – by Hillsong, Cornerstone album” using this link with subtitles/lyrics: http://youtu.be/SQDjLphA-iE
Looking forward to writing to you again soon and will appreciate receiving reply from you regarding this e-mail and/or anything that God has been doing in your life that you would like to share with me.